Reblogging the universe with horse power

They are... THE SPACE STALLIONS

273,215 notes

kurosaki224:

erpsicle:

birdsbirds:

hookteeth:

DUCKS DO IT TOO

good news, everyone.

oh man. one time i was out with a group of friends, it was around 3 in the morning and we’d all just spilled out of this nightclub, all completely smashed, when one guy goes “OI DID YOU SEE THAT? THAT LIGHT JUST THEN??” and this  fUCKING LASER DOT ZOOMS PAST US ON THE GROUND AND WE’RE ALL LIKE YOOOOO DAFUQ IS DIS??? I SWEAR TO GOD WE SPENT NEARLY TEN MINUTES CHASING THIS FUCKING THING AROUND THE STREET BEFORE WE FIGURED OUT THERE WAS SOME ASSHOLE LIKE 10 STORIES UP IN THE APARTMENT BEHIND US PISSING HIMSELF.

so yeah. cats, ducks and drunk college students. fucking idiots the lot of them.

That is the best story I have ever heard.

(Source: onlylolgifs, via jumpingjacktrash)

273 notes

vastderp:

uncannypanels:

Fantastic Four vs. the X-Men #2 by Chris Claremont, Jon Bogdanove, Terry Austin, and Glynis Oliver

MOTHERFUCKERS I OWN THIS ENTIRE STORYLINE AND IT IS THE MOST SPECTACULAR GODDAMN STORY YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW

72 notes

Anonymous asked: As a synonym for isomisogyny, may I suggest "I-can't-believe-it's-not-misogyny!" ?

jumpingjacktrash:

the-real-seebs:

jumpingjacktrash:

the-real-seebs:

I like it.

Only-tangentially-related: I made a joke once about:

a thin brown liquid, marketed under the trade name “I sure hope that’s not butter!”

At one point, due to events, it became desireable for me to make up a large selection of these, and put them in a video game. Some of them (like “roadsign yellow extreme butter substitute”) are mostly irrelevant, but you end up using a couple of them.

iirc, my contribution was “definitely some kind of lipid.”

Yes.

The full list:

More Buttery Than Not
Are You Tired Of Choosing Between Guns And Butter
If That’s Butter, Then I’m Richard Nixon
Definitely Some Sort Of Lipid
It Goes On Toast, Anyway
Roadsign Yellow Extreme Butter Substitute
Butter My Ass!
You Could Convince Me That’s Not Butter
I Am Starting To Suspect That’s Not Butter
It Seems Probable That’s Not Butter
I Would Bet Money That’s Not Butter
Does That Look Like Butter To You?
I Sure Hope That’s Not Butter
Dear God, Don’t Let That Be Butter
That’s Too Thick To Be Butter!
That Looks More Like Hot Air Balloon Fuel Than Butter

The guns-and-butter one was “a fine black powder which spreads easily on toast”. They tended to have funny responses if you tried to smell or taste them. “Dear God, Don’t Let That Be Butter” was “a thick black substance which moves under its own power”. It had the special trait that any attempt to interact with it in normal ways would usually just produce “No.” but occasionally would say “You really have a death wish, don’t you?” You could also listen to it: “It whispers dark concepts in a language that bypasses your conscious mind entirely. Thoughts of death fill your head.”

The ones you actually needed were That Looks More Like Hot Air Balloon Fuel Than Butter (yes, there was a hot air balloon), and That’s Too Thick To Be Butter, a “thick, gritty, grey substance” which you used to repair a brick wall.

i remember the whispering grimdark nonbutter

it sounds like something from night vale but this was years ago